Disenchanted With Dogs
Until I met Wooffers I was always comfortable saying I was a dog person. Not any more. You'd think that with how much I love Le Pooch, living with two woofs would be absolute heaven for me, but it hasn't been. Before moving in I had visions dancing in my head of laying on the floor next to a woof while reading, watching tv with a woof next to me, playing catch or tug-of-war with a woof, etc.
One of the woofs has aggressive tendencies (born out of fear) so you have to be careful with how he's approached. Also, if he gets too excited (from interacting with you), he pees. This happened earlier this week when I was petting him. I was absolutely horrified to see him frantically lick up his own pee with a worried look on his face.
The other woof gets jealous of any attention she sees the aggressive woof getting, and she will start humping him. She doesn't seem to want to be petted, it's more like she puts up with my petting her, but it does nothing for her personally.
In Wooffers' eyes whatever I do with her woofs is wrong. Once I was cooking in the kitchen alone, and when I turned around there was suddenly a woof there that hadn't been. I was holding a sharp knife and almost tripped over the woof. The words that came out of my mouth were, "Whoa ... it's okay," to reassure both myself and the woof that even though we'd both gotten shocked we were indeed fine. Of course Wooffers was sitting at her computer in the dining room-turned-office and chastised me for talking to the woof, reminding me that I was to ignore at all times.
Living with woofs is not fun here, by any stretch of the imagination. For example right now one woof is home, and keeps sticking her head through the living room blinds and crying (Wooffers took the aggressive woof out for a solo walk). Although I'm greatly amused when people trip and fall, I have this instinct to comfort anyone who is crying, man or woof. Comforting is not allowed though, only ignoring is. So here I sit on my bed, listening to a woof cry in the living room.
I fear that I don't like dogs very much anymore. Surely if this all got therapized I would come to see that the problem is not the woofs themselves, but Wooffers and her instructions to ignore, ignore, ignore. I am hopeful that when I move out of here I will go back to loving woofs, and will not cringe when I hear someone proclaim themselves a dog person.
One of the woofs has aggressive tendencies (born out of fear) so you have to be careful with how he's approached. Also, if he gets too excited (from interacting with you), he pees. This happened earlier this week when I was petting him. I was absolutely horrified to see him frantically lick up his own pee with a worried look on his face.
The other woof gets jealous of any attention she sees the aggressive woof getting, and she will start humping him. She doesn't seem to want to be petted, it's more like she puts up with my petting her, but it does nothing for her personally.
In Wooffers' eyes whatever I do with her woofs is wrong. Once I was cooking in the kitchen alone, and when I turned around there was suddenly a woof there that hadn't been. I was holding a sharp knife and almost tripped over the woof. The words that came out of my mouth were, "Whoa ... it's okay," to reassure both myself and the woof that even though we'd both gotten shocked we were indeed fine. Of course Wooffers was sitting at her computer in the dining room-turned-office and chastised me for talking to the woof, reminding me that I was to ignore at all times.
Living with woofs is not fun here, by any stretch of the imagination. For example right now one woof is home, and keeps sticking her head through the living room blinds and crying (Wooffers took the aggressive woof out for a solo walk). Although I'm greatly amused when people trip and fall, I have this instinct to comfort anyone who is crying, man or woof. Comforting is not allowed though, only ignoring is. So here I sit on my bed, listening to a woof cry in the living room.
I fear that I don't like dogs very much anymore. Surely if this all got therapized I would come to see that the problem is not the woofs themselves, but Wooffers and her instructions to ignore, ignore, ignore. I am hopeful that when I move out of here I will go back to loving woofs, and will not cringe when I hear someone proclaim themselves a dog person.
Labels: Harshing Your Mellow, Le Pooch, Therapizing, Wooffers
posted by Green at 6/11/2009 12:56:00 PM
17 Comments:
What this woman is doing is woof abuse. She's not letting them realize themselves in relation to others. They need family therapy. Keep the faith. I know you'll be back to your old woof-loving self as soon as you get out of the disfunctional household.
Seriously, she's projected her (gigantic amount of) issues onto her dogs. No wonder the "aggressive one" is so freaked out all of the time. Dogs absorb their owners' energy.
Don't let that crazy bitch take away from how wonderful being with dogs can be.
So the next time I come to SF, do you think it would be okay if I kicked her?
I think you should dognap when you leave.
I have Never Ever Heard of Ignoring A Dog when it is Behaving Well -- only when it is Behaving Badly. She sounds like A Loon and I would report her for Animal Abuse.
Keep the faith. All this makes for A Great Book.
xoxo,
TDR
This woman sounds like she's seriously on the edge! I'm so glad you're going to get away from her. Who knows when she'll crack?
I admire your restraint. I would probably loose it and snap back at her at some point. Better yet, you should talk to her like she is dog. "No Woofers. Heel. Sit" and use the dog hand signals. Put your hand up, palm facing forward, in front of her face to tell her to stop when she gets out of control.
I am sorry for all involved, animals and humans, is obvious all are suffering; I hope you all find happiness pretty soon.
And don't worry I'm sure you'll go back to being a dog person, and even more than before.
Just look at this: http://bit.ly/wDWk7 .
You got to love woofs.
I agree with Jennie and Randi. It is bizarre behavior to ignore an animal that is behaving well. It may be that her dogs are particularly poorly socialized, but it sounds like she's not doing anything to fix it - the people I know who have had poorly socialized dogs did a lot to help them get better around other people and dogs, and ignoring the bad behavior was part of that, but it was temporary - WHILE the bad behavior was happening. It sounds to me like in addition to having her own significant issues relating to people, she is also an incompetent dog-trainer.
If you start to think you will not like woofs, spend some time with Le Pooch.
100% agree with everyone else. My family helps socialize abused dogs sometimes and the trick with aggressive, anxious, issue ridden dogs is to get them used to people and other animals and to give them lots of attention so they see it's ok. Woofers herself is poorly socialized and her dogs ARE absorbing her neuroses. It's bad for them all. I suspect that perhaps she wants people to ignore her dogs because she has a pathological need to feel like the dogs need and depend on only her. I think she is actually jealous of any affection her dogs could show to someone else and I agree that she is abusive to these dogs as well as the humans around her.
Woofers is completely psycho. I liken it to 'those moms' I see at the school...you feel sorry for their children! Same thing goes for pets, apparently. You can't help but feel sorry for the poor dears. Our bulldog (and cats) would think it was abuse if he didn't sleep in our bed every night! And on the couch...and chair. He is a well adjusted boy and follows commands. When you sweet talk him he gets all wiggly -- dogs apparently DO enjoy verbal attention also!
The woman is plain cuckoopants.
I am dying to know if you answered her email. What did you say?
I really hope you can live alone in the next place!
As I'm learning from all the dog trainers out there -- it's never the dog's fault; it's the owners'. That woman clearly isn't raising the dogs right, and driving you nuts in the process.
It is not that you don't like dogs. It is that you like dogs, but the dog owner of these dogs is a terrible dog owner. I'm so sorry you have to live there at all. This woman should not be around people, and should absolutely not be allowed to own pets of any kind.
I agree with the comment above that this is dog abuse.
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