Fudgesicle Popsicles and You

The other day my throat started hurting something awful, and I decided that before this turned into a Big Sickness I had better get to the store and stock up on everything I'd need to get through it.

One of the things on my mental list was icepops of some sort. Soup was also on my list, but holy shit there is like a week's worth of sodium in every can of every brand of chicken noodle soup at Safeway, so screw that.

Anyway, when looking at the icepops a few different things were going on:

1. I was running out of steam and needed to leave close to Now to get home
2. There was a guy with a huge dolly unloading food which left very little space for people with wagons to get by him
   
3. There was a guy there with his daughter and their wagon, and neither of them had any sense of how much space they and their wagon were taking up

These three things caused me to grab the first vaguely acceptable pop from the freezer and just get out of there. Upon arriving home though, I realized the pop I'd brought home was not the pop I thought it'd be. I thought I'd gotten the skinny fudgesicle popsicles. Those are great because they're the perfect size and you don't feel like since you're eating them you should go make a macaroni necklace while sitting at a wooden picnic table at camp. You're just a respectable adult having a popsicle.

Turns out, I'd gotten the camp size fudgesicles by accident. I'm not a huge fan of these. Firstly, I'm not a huge fan of chocolate. I mean, it's okay, but like, chocolate does not make me happy. You know those women who laugh when eating salad by themselves? Those same women are the ones who close their eyes in bliss when they bite into chocolate. I'm not one of those women.

I just want a little popsicle, not one big enough that it could easily utilize two sticks. Two sticks is one stick too many, and quite frankly I am not a huge fan of those wooden sticks to begin with. The splinter factor is just too great. Plus there's the whole melting issue to keep track of, and who wants to keep an eye on melting chocolate when they're not feeling well? You might say to just eat the popsicle over a bowl, but again, who wants to have to clean up a bowl when they're not feeling well?

On Twitter, I made some comment about having bought the wrong size of fudgesicle, and at least three people expressed surprise that there are different sizes at all. So this blog post is meant to share and educate. There are different sizes. The smaller size is better. Though, not having a sore throat at all would be best.

Well, This Is a New One

All of your comments get emailed to me. So if you ever want to comment on a post I wrote in 2006, but wonder if I'll ever even see it, leave that comment. I will see it. Sometimes, I even forward the email with your comment back to you (if I can find your email address) with a comment of my own.

Every so often one of your comments gets stuck in Spam, but I check and within a week or so, find it. Today I found an email in Spam from someone who wanted to know if I'd like to review a product from their company on my blog.

This is what those mommy bloggers are always hoping for, isn't it? I should be honored, and excited and enthusiastic, right? Apparently the company will either pay money for my review, or if I'd like, they'll let me keep the product free of charge. Ooh, how exciting! Free shit!

As I was reading the e-mail, I thought to myself, "Sure, I'll review a product. I love having opinions on things. I'm low on money, so cash will be great!" And then I got to the bottom of the e-mail. Where it says what the product is, and all my hopes and dreams of having an exciting blog that reviews products came to a crashing halt. Because I'm not going to review a penis enhancer.

Guess I'll just have to stick to writing about people who trip and partners who get fired from law firms (coming soon).

Floating

I'm not just floating between desks, but also between law firms these days. This week I'm working for three partners, two of whom are gay, while their secretary is off at Burning Man. I haven't been trained here, so attorneys give me things to do and I nod like I understand, but I don't. Yesterday afternoon I emailed the HR woman who coordinates floater placement and asked her whose brain I can pick on conflict reports and submitting new matters. Supposedly there will be a quick training session today.

Today's product that we're unofficially testing is Lubriderm Skin Nourishing Moisturizing Lotion with Shea and Cocoa Butters. I should be honest with you guys - I have naturally soft skin, courtesy of my great-grandma, who was generous enough to pass it on down to my grandpa, who passed it on to my mother, who gave it to me. But, just like some people believe you can never be too thin or rich, I believe you can never have soft enough skin.

This stuff went on really well. I always notice if lotion ('it puts the lotion in the basket') is too watery, and this was not. I am not in love with the smell - it's not at all overpowering, but when I do smell it, I am kind of reminded of babies who just got a bath. Which would be as nice as it sounds, except it's as if that baby's mother sniffed her kid and decided that despite the sweet baby smell, the baby needed a little something extra, and put on some smelly stuff.

You should all come meet me on my lunch hour to pet my hands - that's how soft they are. I will have to investigate at some point whether the regular Lubriderm can achieve this level of softness. Later on I will report back as to how long the softness lasted. I know you're all anxiously awaiting the results of this highly scientific testing.

UPDATE: It worked well, but did not last until lunch time when used after 9:30 a.m. Semi-frequent reapplication needed.