Pre-Thanksgiving
Thanksgiving is tomorrow. In the past, I would go to New Jersey with my parents and brother, to my dad's sister's house. For over 20 years we'd drive there for four hours, arrive and eat some veggies and crackers to restore our faith in humanity after being given the finger a dozen times while driving through the Bronx, and then, along with the rest of the cousins (and later, boyfriends and new husbands of said cousins), go out back and play football before eating dinner.
After I moved to Florida, I still made it home to New York for the annual trek to Jersey for the first couple of years. Last Thanksgiving I house and dog sat for a friend of mine. I spent time with Brooklyn, the neediest dog in the world.
This is my first Thanksgiving living in California. My brother lives here too. In fact, up until last Saturday, we could walk to each other's homes. Now he's just a bus ride away. But he's going away for the holiday with his girlfriend. Here is a list of the Thanksgiving invitations I have gotten:
1. That aunt from Jersey I mentioned? Her husband has a brother who lives about an hour away from me here in CA. He and his wife invited me. They are very, VERY nice. In the last 10 years I have met them twice. They are very well traveled, well informed, well rounded, well spoken people. I am well ... nothing. The last time I met them was this past summer, when they took my brother and me out to dinner. I LITERALLY could not keep up with the conversation. Usually I am not shy about asking about things I know nothing about. Because usually it does not happen more than once or twice an hour. Talking with these relatives was like talking to people in another language that I don't speak, where the only words I understood were "si" or "da" - it got embarrassing very quickly. Needless to say, I politely declined their offer.
2. My brother's best friend from law school and that guy's wife invited me to Thanksgiving at their house, also about an hour away. I thought it would be too weird to go to them when my brother isn't going, since they are really HIS friends, not mine, plus I would be getting back to the city VERY late at night, by myself.
3. A random person I know only online. It's not as weird as it sounds - we've chatted online for over a year now, we've mailed each other things, etc. I think we're both convinced we're both sufficiently normal. Again, she lives about an hour away. Plus, I'm not good with people I don't know well. Or large groups of people. Add the two together and you've got yourself A Real World Challenge for one bonafide social retard named Green.
4. Another random person I know from online. At least I've actually met this one in person, and even met her husband and son. AND I like her. AND I know two of the other guests she'll be having, and like them. This person is vegetarian. Now, there's nothing wrong with that and I totally respect it. We haven't gotten into my food issues here, but suffice it to say I have many. She invited me in person, and then, last night she did it again online. She also posted something on one of the websites we both frequent talking about how she wishes more people were coming to her Thanksgiving dinner. If that part of her post was meant for me to see, it's outrightly mean of me to NOT go. Surely I could suck it up for a few hours on the food front, right? Surely of all the things on the table, I could find SOMETHING, right? Surely it's not REALLY about the food, but about being with people. So why exactly did I decline? She actually only lives a short train ride away, not an hour away. If I were to accept any offers, it would be hers.
Don't I realize there are some people who don't get invited to anyone's Thanksgiving dinner? There are senior citizens who live in nursing homes and have nobody come visit, or take them out to their houses to be with family. There are homeless people who live outside who will just be trying to stay warm tomorrow night. There are people fighting in other countries who will be so busy fighting they won't have time for a fancy holiday dinner, but would jump at the chance to be with their families. Why am I rejecting all offers and then feeling sorry for myself that I'm not doing anything? What the fuck is wrong with me? If you know, please feel free to tell me. Clearly I need all the help I can get. And whatever you do, don't invite me to dinner - apparently I won't go, even if on some level I want to.
After I moved to Florida, I still made it home to New York for the annual trek to Jersey for the first couple of years. Last Thanksgiving I house and dog sat for a friend of mine. I spent time with Brooklyn, the neediest dog in the world.
This is my first Thanksgiving living in California. My brother lives here too. In fact, up until last Saturday, we could walk to each other's homes. Now he's just a bus ride away. But he's going away for the holiday with his girlfriend. Here is a list of the Thanksgiving invitations I have gotten:
1. That aunt from Jersey I mentioned? Her husband has a brother who lives about an hour away from me here in CA. He and his wife invited me. They are very, VERY nice. In the last 10 years I have met them twice. They are very well traveled, well informed, well rounded, well spoken people. I am well ... nothing. The last time I met them was this past summer, when they took my brother and me out to dinner. I LITERALLY could not keep up with the conversation. Usually I am not shy about asking about things I know nothing about. Because usually it does not happen more than once or twice an hour. Talking with these relatives was like talking to people in another language that I don't speak, where the only words I understood were "si" or "da" - it got embarrassing very quickly. Needless to say, I politely declined their offer.
2. My brother's best friend from law school and that guy's wife invited me to Thanksgiving at their house, also about an hour away. I thought it would be too weird to go to them when my brother isn't going, since they are really HIS friends, not mine, plus I would be getting back to the city VERY late at night, by myself.
3. A random person I know only online. It's not as weird as it sounds - we've chatted online for over a year now, we've mailed each other things, etc. I think we're both convinced we're both sufficiently normal. Again, she lives about an hour away. Plus, I'm not good with people I don't know well. Or large groups of people. Add the two together and you've got yourself A Real World Challenge for one bonafide social retard named Green.
4. Another random person I know from online. At least I've actually met this one in person, and even met her husband and son. AND I like her. AND I know two of the other guests she'll be having, and like them. This person is vegetarian. Now, there's nothing wrong with that and I totally respect it. We haven't gotten into my food issues here, but suffice it to say I have many. She invited me in person, and then, last night she did it again online. She also posted something on one of the websites we both frequent talking about how she wishes more people were coming to her Thanksgiving dinner. If that part of her post was meant for me to see, it's outrightly mean of me to NOT go. Surely I could suck it up for a few hours on the food front, right? Surely of all the things on the table, I could find SOMETHING, right? Surely it's not REALLY about the food, but about being with people. So why exactly did I decline? She actually only lives a short train ride away, not an hour away. If I were to accept any offers, it would be hers.
Don't I realize there are some people who don't get invited to anyone's Thanksgiving dinner? There are senior citizens who live in nursing homes and have nobody come visit, or take them out to their houses to be with family. There are homeless people who live outside who will just be trying to stay warm tomorrow night. There are people fighting in other countries who will be so busy fighting they won't have time for a fancy holiday dinner, but would jump at the chance to be with their families. Why am I rejecting all offers and then feeling sorry for myself that I'm not doing anything? What the fuck is wrong with me? If you know, please feel free to tell me. Clearly I need all the help I can get. And whatever you do, don't invite me to dinner - apparently I won't go, even if on some level I want to.
posted by Green at 11/24/2004 12:32:00 AM
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