This Is My Life
I took a week off from avoiding phone calls from creditors and begging for work to deal with the death of my grandfather. Which I didn't deal with at all, because that's how I roll. I am scared that if I let myself feel it, if I start crying, I will never stop. I already take 4-6 hour daily naps. Imagine how much worse that would get. If we are friends in real live, please avoid me if it will bother you that almost every other sentence I say to you will start with, "My grandpa used to ..."
Now I am back to begging for work and trying to deal with creditors and unemployment issues while my grandmother is dying.
Yeah. You envy me. Admit it. You wish you had my life.
Now I am back to begging for work and trying to deal with creditors and unemployment issues while my grandmother is dying.
Yeah. You envy me. Admit it. You wish you had my life.
Labels: Cash Flow, Harshing Your Mellow, I'm Hurt, New York State of Mind
posted by Green at 11/17/2008 10:56:00 AM
12 Comments:
I don't envy you, but I do admire the way you roll!
Many of us have been there before you. That will not lessen the pain, but you're not alone.
I'm very sorry for your loss, but they live on through you. You are testimony that they must have been good people to have a grandchild like you.
Wishing you the best.
S
Just when you thought things couldn't get worse, huh? Honey, I feel for you. Not like that's gonna help. Really, really sorry for your loss. Hope you get to enjoy your grandmother whilte she's still here.
Oh, I'm so very sorry for your loss. I'd love to hear some of the things your grandpa used to say and do. Perhaps you can post some of them here, as a sort of tribute to him?
I'm sorry about your grandfather. Life has a way of packing everything in at once, doesn't it? I hope things start looking up soon.
I just reread this. I'm sorry about your grandmother as well. Wow. Why not let yourself cry? It might be cathartic, and it's going to come out sometime. I like to watch Titanic, or some other movie equally unrelated to my reality, and pretend I am crying over THAT drama. It's just a few less steps into denial but always effective.
If I got a phone call and all I can hear on the other end of the phone is a green yogurt sobbing, I'd say, "So tell me more about your grandpa."
I'm so sorry. I know exactly how you feel. Email me if you want to talk or vent or type all in capital letters.
Big hugs, GY. 2009. Your year.
Please please write it out here, about your grandpa. Please. It helped me so much when my grandpa passed a few years ago, to just splat it all there and get some of the "hamster wheel" thoughts in your head out and safely written down. It's a terrible thing to happen to you and your family and it has to come out somehow, somewhere, and into the keyboard is one of the least harmful places for it. I care. I want to hear about him and your relationship with him and how he snuck you cookies when you were little and your mom wasn't looking. big big hugs, honey.
--wojapi
Oh green yogurt...I am so sorry for your loss. I would love to read about your Grandpa, when and if you would like to share.
I am so very sorry about your loss. I lost my grampy going on six years ago now, and it still hurts so much I can't bear it sometimes. Lots of hugs to you.
Char
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