Final Thoughts On Jason Greenberg
I appreciate your support, and your hopes that he can't get it up, and that his dog probably pees on his pillow and all.
But the odds are, he's probably turned into a nice guy. I mean, come on. The people who say "mean kids just grow up to be mean adults" are the same people who say "ignore them and they'll get bored" and those of us who've been teased and bullied know that one's a huge lie.
Jason is probably perfectly nice. His dog is probably sweet. His wife is probably nice. Which makes me wonder.
How many people am I friends with now who, had they known me growing up, would have hurt me then? Not a lot, because I don't have many friends. But of the ones I have, which ones never would have thought I was funny or interesting or creative or whatever? Which ones would have been putting brown clay on my chair (sixth grade) in the hopes I'd sit on it (never did)? Which ones would have put their hand over the empty space at their lunch table and told me I can't sit there, forcing me to wander the cafeteria on the first day of fifth grade until the lunch aide had to intervene and force a group of girls to allow me to sit with them (they never talked to me)?
Jason is probably perfectly nice as a grownup. If I met him at someone else's party he'd probably talk to me without glancing at someone else, hoping they'd rescue him from me.
The reality is that I'll never know who would have been mean to me when I was a kid. I will never, ever know. Jodee Blanco was bullied and teased also. However unlike me, she turned into someone undeniably fabulous and successful. She could be one of those people who goes on Maury for all she's become after being branded a loser in high school. Another way that Jodee Blanco and I are different is she went to her reunion, while I was not even invited to mine.
She went, she talked to people, and some apologized for their past behaviors. Jodee got a date out of it. The last time I saw people from high school who'd teased me, they smirked at me.
Jason, I hope you're a nicer person now than you were then. And maybe, if you decide to have kids, you can teach them to be nicer than you were. I'm sure some other little kid would appreciate that.
But the odds are, he's probably turned into a nice guy. I mean, come on. The people who say "mean kids just grow up to be mean adults" are the same people who say "ignore them and they'll get bored" and those of us who've been teased and bullied know that one's a huge lie.
Jason is probably perfectly nice. His dog is probably sweet. His wife is probably nice. Which makes me wonder.
How many people am I friends with now who, had they known me growing up, would have hurt me then? Not a lot, because I don't have many friends. But of the ones I have, which ones never would have thought I was funny or interesting or creative or whatever? Which ones would have been putting brown clay on my chair (sixth grade) in the hopes I'd sit on it (never did)? Which ones would have put their hand over the empty space at their lunch table and told me I can't sit there, forcing me to wander the cafeteria on the first day of fifth grade until the lunch aide had to intervene and force a group of girls to allow me to sit with them (they never talked to me)?
Jason is probably perfectly nice as a grownup. If I met him at someone else's party he'd probably talk to me without glancing at someone else, hoping they'd rescue him from me.
The reality is that I'll never know who would have been mean to me when I was a kid. I will never, ever know. Jodee Blanco was bullied and teased also. However unlike me, she turned into someone undeniably fabulous and successful. She could be one of those people who goes on Maury for all she's become after being branded a loser in high school. Another way that Jodee Blanco and I are different is she went to her reunion, while I was not even invited to mine.
She went, she talked to people, and some apologized for their past behaviors. Jodee got a date out of it. The last time I saw people from high school who'd teased me, they smirked at me.
Jason, I hope you're a nicer person now than you were then. And maybe, if you decide to have kids, you can teach them to be nicer than you were. I'm sure some other little kid would appreciate that.
Labels: Little Green, Potential Depth
posted by Green at 12/31/2007 09:18:00 AM
3 Comments:
I try to avoid learning about people from my past, where they are now and what they're doing. I forgive them for their youthful mistakes, as I hope others do for me. And prefer to leave the past exactly there -- in the past. My present and future is for people I know or want to get to know, not once knew... if that makes sense.
btw, you've got mail.
Even though I don't know you, it strikes me that there's probably not much difference between you and Jodee Blanco -- she just got to a point in her life where she decided to speak to herself in a more nurturing way than she had in the past. She probably used to say a lot of the things to herself that you now say to yourself, but over time she probably changed her thinking patterns, and her reality now reflects that change. I think you should give yourself a little bit more credit for being the fabulous person that you are.
Aw, Green, I'm sorry this is hurting you.
I remember in high school, I had to sit next to a guy in math who had been horrible to me when I was in third grade (so horrible, him and some others, that I switched schools). And he tried to be nice to me, because I had won something and he wanted to saw "congratulations," and I just glared at him like the worm that he was. But clearly, he had forgotten all that, or maybe he just thought it wasn't a big deal, and he wanted to say something nice. I would have preferred an apology, but maybe that means that he'd turned around. I don't know.
I like to think people see the error of their ways and become nicer people. Not all do. But some do. I'm hoping Jason is one who does, and that he feels badly for how he treated you.
Have you thought of sending him an email to the effect of, "I'm glad to see you have a nice life. After having you bully me for years, I hope that you are a nicer person now and that you don't take for granted the good things that you have"?
Post a Comment
<< Home